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VIOLA E PROFONDO di Parrella

Il vento si era fermato a giugno e l’aria, grassa di umidità strappata al mare, si era seduta sulla città, occupando tutti i vuoti, rivestendo i pieni, schiacciando le ombre. Da due settimane assorbiva immobile il sole, diventava incandescente fino al tramonto e dopo ancora, per tutta la notte, ristagnava tra i vicoli appiccicosa di salsedine e liquami decomposti esalati dalle fogne.
Divorava tutto quello che si muoveva: tutte le energie pensate, dette, lavorate, trasportate nelle casse, nelle borse, negli zaini; tutti nella stessa città, alla stessa fermata, e poi tutti nello stesso autobus di lamiere arancioni, dal centro alla periferia.
L’autobus imponeva una forzata coabitazione ed una paziente resistenza alla compressione umana, e adesso a Sofia dispiaceva di aver messo il vestito corto, che aveva scelto più leggero di tutti perché non aggiungesse calore al calore, e che si rivelava una protezione nulla alla commistione di corpi ed umori. Sofia era enorme. Le sue braccia talmente grasse che il giromanica le stringeva come lacci emostatici, e la collanina scompariva nelle pieghe del collo: lasciava la medaglietta incollata al petto.
Fermata per fermata l’autobus si disfaceva e rifaceva sempre nuovo, ma c’era un ragazzo che restava sempre là, e tra le spalle e le teste la guardava. Morboso e bello, senza perderla d’occhio tra la gente.
L’autobus si arrampicava verso la parte alta della città, e lasciava grappoli di persone sui marciapiedi. Quando si fu sgravato a sufficienza, Sofia potè sedersi, perché erano ore che trascinava i suoi novanta chili sulle caviglie gonfie, e anche per depistare quella muta inquisizione: lo sguardo di quel ragazzo la indispettiva, la costringeva a voltarsi per poi ritornarvi. Il sedere le trabordò dal sediolino, si appoggiò allo schienale e chiuse gli occhi. L’aria era così densa che si faceva fatica anche a tirarla nei polmoni, e portava così poco ossigeno che il petto non si saziava mai.
A una fermata il corridoio si svuotò e lei rivide il ragazzo, per intero: la fissava ed aveva l’inguine eccitato nei jeans. In tre passi le fu affianco e si fermò di faccia al finestrino, reggendosi allo schienale di lei.
Le venne un attacco di fame: avrebbe voluto divorare chili di frittura, voleva diventare ancora più grassa, lì, sul momento, crescere a vista d’occhio e urlare: perché mi fissi, non vedi che sono enorme?
Gli altri passeggeri erano distratti, guardavano l’orologio e si sventolavano senza risultato, lei invece era costretta sul sediolino che le era sembrato la salvezza: il ragazzo le imponeva la ragione della propria natura e il torto di quel vestitino leggero.
La prepotenza del gesto era evidente, eppure, la chiamava a vivere dal profondo del ventre, la resuscitava contro voglia dalla fatica di trascinarsi nell’aria pesante.
Lui guardò fuori, le sorrise:
– mi prenoti la fermata?-
Lei arrossì: mentre sollevava il braccio per schiacciare il pulsante sentì il viso macchiarsi con violenza.
-grazie- disse, e la guardò ancora una volta.
Poi mentre le porte si aprivano le strappò via la collana e saltò giù dall’autobus lasciandole un segno viola e profondo lungo la piega del collo.

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